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16

Mar

In the beginning, God created this bitch and it was good. She was good. All was just super good.  This bitch fell in love with Barney, and thus her appreciation for that super de duper cute deaf kid was born. Remember him? Well, I sure do. The producers at Barney always seemed to discover the cutest of the most broken children. Freckles? I can dig. Wheelchair ridden? I fucking want. As the 90’s turned into the century we know and love today, my infatuation for all men awkward has not. Lucky for me, I learned not to limit myself to only the crippled. I have since found love and/or lust in the following: A “hood” black boy who was afraid of badgers and other assorted critters A bearded mountain man who will forever harbor an obnoxious love for Neil Young A sk8rboi albino with yellow teeth A half Egyptian adolescent who resembled a Holocaust victim  River Phoenix (dead) Ted Neeley as Jesus (dead and half dead) But wait, there’s more! Follow me and witness whatever remaining dignity I have left diminish with every click of the “Create post” button.  Love always, Skankerella

In the beginning, God created this bitch and it was good. She was good. All was just super good. 

This bitch fell in love with Barney, and thus her appreciation for that super de duper cute deaf kid was born. Remember him? Well, I sure do. The producers at Barney always seemed to discover the cutest of the most broken children. Freckles? I can dig. Wheelchair ridden? I fucking want.

As the 90’s turned into the century we know and love today, my infatuation for all men awkward has not. Lucky for me, I learned not to limit myself to only the crippled. I have since found love and/or lust in the following:

  • A “hood” black boy who was afraid of badgers and other assorted critters
  • A bearded mountain man who will forever harbor an obnoxious love for Neil Young
  • A sk8rboi albino with yellow teeth
  • A half Egyptian adolescent who resembled a Holocaust victim 
  • River Phoenix (dead)
  • Ted Neeley as Jesus (dead and half dead)

But wait, there’s more! Follow me and witness whatever remaining dignity I have left diminish with every click of the “Create post” button. 

Love always,

Skankerella

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